Corsicana Daily Sun, Corsicana, Texas


December 6, 2013

Morgan: I told you so

Corsicana — I told you so. The wussification of America is in full swing. It has now engulfed the last bastion of masculinity, the league formerly known as the NFL.  

It started with rules to protect the quarterback, then expanded to defenseless receivers, then went on to leading with the helmet and now they’re banning Super Bowl ads for a company that sells guns.

Don’t get me wrong. I firmly believe that the NFL has a right to air ads from anyone they please, and ban ads in the same fashion. It is a free market. The NFL is a business, and I fully support their right to do as they please without the influence of government or any special interest group.

If they feel that is in their own best self-interest to ban the ad, so be it.

I’m just not sure that the reason has to do with market forces or what’s best for the league.

I’m afraid the reason was political expediency. I’m afraid it’s another case of political correctness.

The company proposing the ad was Daniel Defense. NFL guidelines for ads prohibit any ad from promoting the sale of guns. The company must sell things other than guns (like Cabellas, Gander Mountain or Bass Pro), and the ad must not mention guns, ammunition or weapons. Daniel Defense followed all the guidelines.

The closest thing to a gun in the ad was a silhouette of one in their logo. They even offered to replace it with an American flag, and the NFL still nixed it.

I’ll bet drunk drivers kill more people every year than legally owned guns. Will the league ban Budweiser ads? I’ll bet not.

The FDA is in the process of banning trans fats. Will the NFL ban ads for Twinkies? What do you think?

How long will it be before they ban the name Cowboys?

Everyone knows that the traditional image of a cowboy is someone in ten gallon hat with a six gun on his hip. I’ve seen Rowdy on the sidelines making a gun with his thumb and forefinger. Will he be fined?

What about Louis Vasquez? How many times do you suppose he’s made the TT guns up sign?

Next Monday night, count how many times Tony Romo lines up in the shotgun.

Last Sunday, did you see Tom Brady in the pistol?  Then, what about the Indianapolis “Colts”? Is that the young horse variety or “the gun that won the West?” If the NFL overlooks those things, isn’t that selective PC?

However, isn’t wussification all about contradictions? When you take a league that has made its fame on the size, speed and violence of its players, and try to make it “safe” it does not compute.  

Texas Tech students should avoid some elementary schools. In those schools, if a six year old makes a”guns up sign,” it violates the school’s Zero Tolerance Program. (And heaven forbid he should eat his toast into the form of a pistol.)

Smokers of tobacco in a Denver stadium are now scofflaws. Smokers of marijuana are simply exercising their newest state given right. Gives a whole new meaning to”Mile High Stadium” huh?”Stop and Frisk” in New York City is no longer about finding illegal guns. It’s putting a stop to killer Big Gulps.”Put down that Dr. Pepper, and slowly back away.”

In our newly wussified America, words are culprits. Context matters not. If the renowned scumbag, Alec Baldwin uses angry words about gays, he’s slammed. It doesn’t mean he’s homophobic. It means he has anger management issues. If Paula Dean used the N word 30 years ago after being mugged by a black man, it doesn’t mean she’s a racist. They were angry words. If Richie Incognito, possibly as big a scumbag as Alec Baldwin, says things in context of privileged inner locker room dialogue, it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a racist or a bully.  What happens in locker rooms all over the newly wussified NFL has always been kept among teammates and not for publication.

Of course, there are exceptions to culprit words. It depends on whom they are used. If Martin Brashear or Bill Maher use hate speech toward Sarah Palin, then that’s simply their first amendment right. However, if Sean Hannity or Bill O’Reilly used that same language toward Hillary Clinton…well, you get my drift.

I’m in the process of moving, so I’ve already bought a huge roll of bubble wrap, and by this weekend, will most likely go after another one. I might need to buy stock in the company that produces the addictively fun-to-pop plastic wrap. Pretty soon they’ll be buying it by the truckload to wrap up the entire WFL … The Wuss Football League.  No wonder they’ve started wearing pink sweat bands.

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    April 21, 2014

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