Corsicana Daily Sun, Corsicana, Texas

Sports

September 27, 2013

Morgan: Big Hoss

Corsicana — About a year ago, my TV went out. I went to Fry’s to find the latest in video technology. As I walked in I found a 70” LED LCD with 1080p, 240 HZ and 3D technology. Suddenly, I was the top dog in the neighborhood. Did I mention that simultaneously, I got the whole home DVR? I was the supreme potentate of all things broadcast.

However, we all know how fleeting fame can be.  Before I could record an entire season of Duck Dynasty, I saw an ad for an 80” version. Next thing I know, they are showing off ultra-high definition TVs with more pixels that Carter has liver pills. Before I even had time to lord it over my friends with 52” flat screens, I was a has-been. My reign was as brief as a Zachary Taylor presidency or a Barack Obama mea culpa.

Now I know just how Jerry Jones feels. When AT&T Jerry World opened, it contained the world’s largest TV screen. Watching a game in the Death Star… oops, make that the AT&T Death Star, was just like kicking back and watching the game in your own living room. The screen that dangles over the players heads like the Sword of Damocles (a term that I didn’t pick up in English literature, but from the Three Stooges) is over 11,000 square feet of crunching blows and jiggling cheerleaders.

Reliant Stadium in Houston has since passed Jerry’s Mitsubishi with a larger screen inside their dome, but it was only a couple of feet bigger. It wasn’t enough to take the luster off of Jerry’s big screen. Being the first still gave Jerry the bragging rights. He was still the original, the trend setter.

    That’s no longer the case. Jerry is now officially the Ron Morgan of big screen owners. Texas Motor Speedway, just down the road from my office, has this week announced their own big screen TV.

They didn’t top the Reliant Stadium television by a couple of feet. Heck, Jerry’s TV doesn’t even rate its own name. The new screen at TMS does. Local NASCAR fans will be able to watch replays on “Big Hoss”. No, Big Hoss isn’t the star of Bonanza who could have won a Ray Jacobs look-alike contest.

Big Hoss is a 218 ft. by 94.6 ft. high definition Panasonic TV that will sit atop the stands at the local race track. Big Hoss will outweigh Dan Blocker by approximately 216,000 lbs. It will contain 4.8 million pixels and flash 281 trillion colors. The 20,633 square feet of screen is almost an acre of TV viewing pleasure doubling Jerry’s dangling participle of an LCD.

You know we like to brag about everything being bigger in Texas. We are now home to the three largest television sets in the world, the tallest roller coaster in the world, the world’s biggest rattle snake hunt and Ted Cruz’ ego. Our motto? Go big or go home.

    So, I guess Jerry and I have a lot in common. Neither of us has the biggest and best set in the neighborhood any more. I’m not sure that the set at the stadium has worked out quite like they expected. If you look on the sideline, the players are looking up to watch the game. They don’t watch it on the field.  I’ve been to a few games in the uppermost deck where I just put my feet up and watch on the big screen. I have to look down at ant sized players to see it on the field. That’s when it dawned on me that if I sat home, I could have the same experience with much lower prices on concessions. I mean, I have to make my own nachos, but it’s at least $10 cheaper.

I’m not sure of the effects at TMS. In the two high school games I’ve watched in the AT&T Death Star (the only time I got to sit in the lower deck), I got a stiff neck from looking up at the screen (where you can see more of the action). With Big Hoss on top of the stands, some 80,000 people will have to look up and behind them to see the high definition racing. What hurts Jerry’s ego will be a boon to the chiropractic industry.

    In the old west, for every gun slinger, there was always someone just a little bit faster. For every Corvette on the road, there is someone with a Ferrari. Eventually, someone came along who was better than Emmitt Smith. Dynasties don’t last forever.  The pride of my living room was soon just another TV. Jerry has been relegated to third class, and eventually, someone will take on Big Hoss.      

Enjoy it while you can, Big Hoss. Enjoy it while you can.

 

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